Monday, July 5, 2010

Free Kobi!

I really didn't want to end my long blogless streak with a post about professional eating. Actually I didn't care what I ended it with, I just don't like the idea behind professional eating, I think it's vulgar, then again I am more or less a priss. But oh well.

I spent most of Independence Day in bed with a headache, this meant I spent a lot of time channel surfing. One of the recent television staples of July 4th has become the Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest in Brooklyn (the other Brooklyn, not our Brooklyn, Charlotte's not gross). Over the years ESPN has used the sporting lull that is July 4th to introduce us to the characters of this grand affair, people like Juliet Lee, Joey Chestnut and Takeru Kobayashi. Kobayashi (or Kobi, if you're cool with him) is like the Yokohama F. Marinos of hot dog eating, a once dominant and now fading force. Chestnut is like the Urawa Red Diamonds, he has a lot of fans and lately he's been winning titles. Also his fans will fight you on message boards, like Tim D'Annunzio -- who I have figured as a bit of a Kettering Town man.

Anyway, I need to cut to the chase before I start revealing just how little I know about this stuff. Kobi wasn't allowed to eat hot dogs on Sunday because he refused to sign an exclusive deal with Major League Eating, which I guess is like the WWE of professional eating. This is because Kobi is -- in professional gluttony terms -- a celebrity worth a lot of money. He's also very marketable. He knows this, and MLE knows this, this is why MLE wants him to sign a deal, so he can't eat for anyone else. Kobi doesn't want to sign a deal because it would prevent him from eating publicly for his own sponsors.

Drama bomb in here.

I guess Major League Eating is will within their rights to tie up Kobi, I mean, Vince McMahon doesn't let his guys wrestle in other wrestling promotions, but at the same time Vince pays his guys a decent wage, you have to wonder how much an MLE contract is worth. I mean, we can't be talking LeBron James numbers here, can we? With that in mind, I feel for Kobi. I mean, I think he's gross, but he still has a right to make money off his image, and as a professional eater I can't imagine he has a lot of opportunities flying his way.

Oh well, I guess we'll see how this one works out. Unless I lose interest, which I probably will. Maybe I should take up professional eating, I'm thin as a rail.