What about cars regular people can buy?

NASCAR used to, and still does to a small degree, have a mantra that went "Win on Sunday, Sell on Monday". They said this because the cars they raced on the NASCAR circuit were actually cars that you common people could afford to buy at the car dealership on Monday. But that all changed when NASCAR race cars became a thin sheet of metal on a roll cage, it looked like the car you could buy, but it wasn't, and that got worse thwne they introduced the "car of tomorrow" which makes every car, regardless of make, basically the same.

Recently NASCAR announced that the Ford Mustang and Dodge Challenger would compete in the Nationwide Series as that series' car of tomorrow models. The problem is that common people can't afford those now even if they looked like the real one you could buy.

Today on the X-Games Ford used the rally event to introduce the American public to the newest car in it's American stable, the Fiesta. The Fiesta is an affordable, gas-saving subcompact that has proven itself wildly popular in Europe. There was once a school of thought, which is lessening, that Americans don't like things Europeans like...tell that to Jane. Jane is a friend of mine. She's from Texas and she's very, very Texan. If you think of the "All-American girl" the image you think of probably resembles Jane in some way. Earlier this year Jane was picked by Ford to become a "Fiesta Agent", a group of internet-savvy people chosen to honestly review the Fiesta for six months, and perform strange tasks while doing so. Jane adores her Fiesta, and it gets positive reviews wherever she goes. Yes, these cars do work in America.

With this in mind, I asked myself, why doesn't NASCAR -- which is suffering from falling popularity -- catch wind of this? People like the Fiesta, and people can afford the Fiesta. In 2010 Ford will enter three different vehicles in NASCAR's three national divisions: The Fusion, the Mustang, and the F-150. I understand the appeal of all three, but why isn't there a division for smaller cars? I know people will say "Because they're small", but the Fiesta was very entertaining to watch as a rally car and would be entertaining on courses like Charlotte and Bristol if it was kept as is. It could race along side the 500 if Fiat brings it over as a Chrysler, the Yaris, and Chevy's neglected Aveo. People would watch, and people would buy.

Indianapolis Motor Speedway is a problem

I noticed NASCAR was at Indianapolis Motor Speedway this week. Between the BS about how prestigious the venue is they mentioned something about how during the 2008 NASCAR race at IMS the tires tore all to hell. Tire problems? At Indy? That sounds familiar.

In 2005 Formula 1 staged their United States Grand Prix at Indianapolis Motor Speedway, it turned into the biggest charade in motorsports history as paying fans witnessed what as essentally a parade as all the cars using Michelin tires pulled out of the race after tire wear issues in earlier sessions.

Both times the blame was deflected. In 2005 Formula 1 and Michelin were blamed for the incident, in fact, it basically destroyed the relationship and left Bridgestone as the sole tire supplier in Formula 1 as Michelin pulled out. In 2008 NASCAR and Goodyear were blamed, Goodyear brought a bad tire and NASCAR let them do it people said. Different tires, different cars. But lets look again, what do these two incidents have in common?

The Indianapolis Motor Speedway.

The track itself is the problem. Not F1, not Bernie's hair, not NASCAR, not Brian France's jaw, but the track. The holy, the infallible, the precious yard of bricks. The track caused both incidents, and if it wasn't Indianapolis Motor Speedway, people would've blamed the track for the incidents just like they blame Talladega when someone flies into the air at Talladega. The difference is that Talladega was built in the late 60's by a guy many people like to think of as a redneck, and the races were attended by people many like to think of as rednecks (and trust me, there are a good few rednecks) so it's impossible to attach "presitigious" to Talladega Superspeedway like you can Indianapolis Motor Speedway, but Talladega Superspeedway has one glaring thing in common with The holy, the infallible, the precious yard of bricks.

Talladega Superspeedway sucks.

It's too big, it's literally the size of an airport because it used to be it's own airport. You can't see all of it from the stands, a trait it shares with Indianapolis. It's gimmicky, just like Indy. No, there's nothing simple and elegant about building a golf course and a freaking castle in the middle of a track, it looks gaudy. You want to see how a simple, elegant, very American race track looks? Look here, where the USGP belongs.

I know, I know: The history! Just because a sports venue has history doesn't make it impervious to criticism. I'll say this right now: Hampden Park is an awful little turd of a stadium. It has a track that isn't big enough for track events, it's dirty, and the fans are a million miles from the field. Hampden has more history in it's sport than Indy does.

I know what you'll say: "Indy is better than Charlotte" and you'd be wrong. Charlotte's track isn't perfect, but it's better than Indy. Yes, Charlotte is gimmicky as hell, but you can see the entire tracks. Yea, tracks, Charlotte has three configurations within it's main oval, and you can see the entirety of all three from the stands.

It's time we admit the truth here, the track is doing more harm than good for motorsports in America.

NASCAR needs to leave it. Move Atlanta's date back to the fall, move California's fall date to Indy's weekend, and bring back Darlington's second date for Labor Day. Darlington is a better track.

F1 needs a USGP, but it doesn't need Indy. It needs to alternate coasts each year: Odd years - Watkins Glen, even years - Laguna Sega.

On some of that ol' Jeremy Mayfield sh*t

It won't stop. It just won't.

I'm not a great NASCAR fan, but I do live in Charlotte which would make me an expert in NASCAR by the standards of any other city.

In Charlotte, Jeremy Mayfield's court battle with NASCAR is as big a news item as the Sonia Sotomayor confirmation hearings, and a bigger deal than the Mexico v United States match being on Mun2. That's to be expected though, NASCAR is more or less Charlotte's second biggest industry after incompetent guys in suits screwing up and getting bailed out by the same people they keep trying to screw over, I mean banking.

By now I'm sure everyone knows, it's even mainstream on ESPN. Back in May NASCAR claimed that Jeremy Mayfield failed a drug test and announced he'd be suspended. Mayfield denied any accusations of doing drugs, as you would expect, and demanded that NASCAR lift his ban. NASCAR said "no", they can do that because one family owns NASCAR, it's not like the Premier League, the NFL, or The Custodian of the Two Holy Mosques League Cup, well, it's a little like that one. Of course upon hearing that NASCAR denied his request, Mayfield sued them. He went out and got Charlotte's biggest (literally and figuratively) lawyer, Bill Diehl (random fact: Bill Diehl's wife was my third grade teacher, and a good one at that - six degrees of NASCAR, bitches) to represent him in court. NASCAR countersued and everything went crazy. Eventually Diehl found a way to get Jeremy's ban lifted by the courts, NASCAR was pissed. Mayfield was allowed to show up at Daytona, NASCAR even had guys at the gate waiting on him, no word on whether or not they also had a truck load of wild Pit Bulls. Mayfield didn't bring his #41 car to the track.

Mayfield also no-showed the following week (at "Chicago") and rumors began to circle as to why, some accused him of doing meth again. On July 15th NASCAR announced that Mayfield had failed a drug test, again for meth, on July 6th and had a sworn statement from his stepmother saying she'd seen him snort meth at least "thirty times" in a seven-year period. Mayfield blew his top. He said of his stepmother "She's pretty much a whore" and said that she "shot and killed (his) dad". He also said she's always trying to get money out of him, that she's a golddigger, and a trashy bitch, rumor has it he dropped the C-bomb on her too. She sure sounds like a class act. But, if she saw him doing it "at a race shop in Mooresville (Mooresville is a giant race shop, basically)", why didn't anyone else in the race shop see it. Okay, he may have been alone with her at that time, I'll concede that, but why didn't she alert NASCAR to the problem knowing that a tweaked-out driver was putting at least fourty-two other lives at risk every week?

Mayfield also said of Brian France: “Brian France out there talking about effective drug policy, it’s kind of like Al Capone talking about effective law enforcement. And that’s the way I feel about it. The pot shouldn’t be calling the kettle black, you know what I’m saying? And I think the world needs to hear that, too.” Which I thought was hilarious.

That was it, that was Jeremy's story, or at least that was Jeremy's version of the story. A couple of days later I got the truth from Tommy, you always got the truth from Tommy, it was one of his major weaknesses. He never lied, he never took drugs, and he never cheated on anyone...wait, that never happened.

Anyway, back on topic. Mayfield says he's going to fight NASCAR with everything he's got, and he will. One thing that has to be said for Jeremy Mayfield is that he doesn't know when to quit, he doesn't know how to give up. He never has, he never will. If he's lying then he's really playing with fire, but if he's telling the truth NASCAR could end up in a world of hurt. WADA has already said their drug testing policies are garbage and NASCAR still refuses to adhear to WADA guidelines, probably because WADA is European. Because of NASCAR's hardheadedness on this issue there's still a chance that the judge will rule against them, having expressed disfavor with NASCAR's testing methods in the past. Jeremy also says that he has passed several independent lab tests since May, if he's telling the truth, Brian France has some 'splainin' to do. Okay, enough channeling Tom Coburn.

Somewhat on topic, but meth is/was considered a WMD in parts of North Carolina. Really.

But remember, when you say the name of the make that wins the championship in 2011: it's Hyundai (Hun-Day), like "Sunday".

That said, this evil little peace loving librul needs his sleep.